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Top Ten/Transcript
(Lively instrumental music) (Episode begins at Garfield's house at night where Garfield is sleeping, just before Jon calls for him) Jon: 'Garfield! Dinner is ready! '''Garfield: '''Oh, what lovely words to wake up to. ''(yawns and stretches) (Garfield gets out of his bed and into the dining room at the table) 'Jon: '''I fixed a small meal for you, Garfield, because I have to get ready for my date. I am going out with Frieda tonight, and we're gonna have a great... ''(While Jon dreamily walks away and explains, Garfield is already eating the meal. Then Jon walks back and sees the meal is already eaten. Garfield burps) 'Jon: '''Ooh, I just remembered. If I'm not home by 10:30, I want you to...(gasp)'' 'Garfield: '''What's for dessert? '''Jon: '''There was food on those plates a minute ago. I know! I put it there myself! '''Garfield: '''And don't think some of us don't appreciate it. ''(eats one of the remaining morsels of food) 'Jon: '''Garfield, the way you eat...how am I ever to know when you've had enough? ''(Garfield takes out a piece of paper) 'Garfield: '''Funny you should ask that. I have here a list of the top ten ways to tell when Garfield has had enough to eat. Drum roll, please! ''(a drum roll is heard and Garfield begins to read the list) '''Garfield: ''(reading) Number ten: Has after-dinner mint the size of a volleyball; Number nine: Loud burp reported, heard as far off as New Zealand; Number 8: Has to let his fur out another size; ''(Garfield takes out a slice of cheese) Garfield: ''(reading) Number seven: Local mice starving due to citywide cheese shortage; Number six: Passes on a nineteenth helping.... ''(Garfield eats another remaining morsel of food) Garfield: ''(reading) Number five: Finally lets Odie have a bite; ''(Garfield pats his tummy) Garfield: ''(reading) Number four; Cat stomach mistaken for fur-covered Rose Parade float; Number three: Hesitates before asking about a midnight snack; Number two; Owner of market where Arbuckle shops retires to Tahiti at age twenty-seven... ''(Timpani is added to the drum roll) Garfield: ''(reading) And the number one way to tell when Garrfield has had enough to eat: There's no more food left.. ''(The Buddy Bears, Bobby, Billy, and Bertie come in with their cello, trumpet, and mobile piano, respecitvely, and play a stinger, surprising and confusing Jon, then they quickly leave) Jon: 'I won't pretend to know what's going on. I don't even know how you ate all that food all by yourself. ''(Odie comes into the dining room) '''Garfield: '''I had to. Odie was late. ''(to Odie) ''You can have whatever is left. '''Odie: ''(barks excitedly, but sees the food is all gone) Hmm? ''(grunts disgustedly and runs after Garfield, who grabs a bowl of fruit) Garfield: '''Well, maybe you won't be late next time. '''Odie: ''(mutters a question to Garfield)'' Garfield: 'What an odd coincidence that you should ask that, Odie. ''(puts the bowl on top of Odie's head and takes out another piece of paper) I just happen to have here a list of the top ten reasons why dates with Jon Arbuckle are so short. (snaps his fingers) ''Drum roll! ''(Bertie Buddy Bear comes in and plays a drum roll) (Quick scene change to a fast-food restaurant where Jon and one of his dates are eating) '''Garfield: ''(reading) Number ten: Most women don't appreciate a dinner where a teenager asks: "You want fries with that?" ''(Teenager takes out some fries) (Quick scene change to cinema where Jon, his date, and a crowd of people sit with an accordion in his hand) Garfield: ''(reading) Number nine: Women like being serenaded, but not in the middle of the move. ''(Jon plays the accordion and sings, to the chargin of his date and the audience) (Quick scene change to Italian restaurant where Jon and his date are eating, but his date has spaghetti on her head thanks in no small part to Jon) Garfield: ''(reading) Number eight: Pasta not intended for external use. '''Jon: '''Gee, I'm sorry. Now, hold still. Is that your earring or one of my meatballs? ''(Quick scene change to Jon and his date in the rain; Jon is in the car while the woman angrily tries to push it) Garfield: ''(reading) Number seven: Romantic mood spoiled by phrase, "You may have to get out and push." '''Jon: '''Keep going. It's almost starting. ''(Quick scene change to another restaurant where Jon is on a table, acting like a monkey) Garfield: ''(reading) Number six: Three words: "No animal imitations." ''(Quick scene change to an auditorium where Garfield is sitting between Jon and his date and eating) Garfield: ''(reading) Number five: Most women prefer adjoining seats at a concert. ''(Quick scene change to another house where one of Jon's dates is being eaten by Venus flytrap) Garfield: ''(reading) Number four: Venus flytrap plant makes lousy corsage. '''Woman: '(muffled shrieking) Jon: 'Gee, the man at the florist shop said you'd love it. ''(Quick scene change to a party where Jon is dressed like a chicken while everyone else is dressed formally) '''Garfield: ''(reading) Number three: Forgot to double-check if it really was a costume party. '''Jon: '''Oh, no. I distinctly remember on my invitation. It said.... ''(Quick scene change to another woman's house where Jon and the woman are watching a test pattern) Garfield: ''(reading) Number two: Watching test pattern infinitely more fun than tales of winning high school dodge ball championship. '''Jon: '''Then he threw the ball at me. Then I threw the ball at him. ''(The woman begins to slink down on the couch) Jon: 'Then he threw the ball at me. ''(The woman slinks down again) 'Jon: '''Then I threw the ball at him. ''(The woman slinks down for a third time) '''Jon: '''Then he threw the ball at me, then I REALLY threw the ball at him! '''Garfield: ''(reading) And the number one reason why dates with Jon Arbuckle are short: ''(Quick scene change to another woman's residence where Jon shows up in boxer shorts and the timpani is added to the drum roll) Garfield: ''(reading) Sometimes forgets pants. '''Woman: '(gasps) (Back in Garfield's house, the Buddy Bears play their stinger and quickly leave while Garfield takes the fruit bowl off of Odie's head) (Jon comes in and leaves in a brown suit for his date) Jon: 'I'm going out for my date, guys. I'll be back later. '''Garfield: '''You'll be back sooner. ''(Jon walks out the front door and hums merrily) (A cat burglar, the same one from two previous episodes, hides in a bush just as Jon is leaving. Then he pops out and begins to sneak in) '''Cat Burglar: ''(snickers) Guy's gone for the evening and the house is deserted...except for those pets. Ought to be a pushover to rob. ''(Garfield and Odie are in the living room eating and watching TV) Garfield: ''(to Odie): What do you mean I'll eat anything that Jon puts on the table? ''(Odie answers in dog language as Garfield eats a banana) Garfield: '''I'll have you know that there a number of things I hate to find on the dinner table. '''Odie: ''(snickers) Really? '''Garfield: '''Yes! ''(takes out another piece of paper) ''Hit it, Bertie! ''(Bertie appears and does a drum roll) Garfield: ''(reading) The top ten things Garfield hates to find on the dinner table. ''(scene change to kitchen where Garfield describes what he hates to see as it appears) Garfield: ''(reading) Number ten: Raisins; Number nine: pepperoni pizza with pencil erasers instead of pepperoni; Number eight: Hot fudge sundae with ketchup on it; Number seven: Moose stew that still has the antlers in it; Number six: More raisins; Number five; Tuna fish sandwich with live tuna in it; Number four: snow tires; Number three: Lots more raisins; Number two:...Nermal. ''(opens the pot, which reveals Nermal) (timpani is added to the drum roll) Garfield: ''(reading) And the number one thing Garfield hates to find on the dinner table: Nermal with raisins. ''(Garfield snaps his fingers, and Bobby, Billy, and Bertie Buddy Bear come in and play the first two measures of the "Garfield and Friends" theme) (Garfield munches on a banana and gulps it down with a quick sleigh bell sound effect) Garfield: '''I hired them for the day. They're not bad. '''Odie: ''(nodding in agreement) Mm-hm. ''(The cat burglar has come into the living room and quietly tiptoes to try and steal stuff) '' ''(suspenseful instrumental music) Cat Burglar: '''Hm. Just the dumb cat and dog home. I'm gonna clean up here. '''Odie: ''(sees the burglar and barks in alarm to Garfield, who tosses a banana peel across the room)'' Garfield: 'Yeah, it's a burglar. But I'm not concerned. And you know why not? I have a list of the top ten reasons why a burglar will fail in trying to rob our home. Let's go. ''(Bertie Buddy Bear comes in and does a drum roll) '''Garfield: ''(reading) Number ten: That slipper throw rug in the living room. ''(The burglar slips on the throw rug) Cat Burglar: '''Yow! '''Garfield: ''(reading) Number nine: Will probably fall down basement stairs. ''(The cat burglar trips on Odie's doggie toy and falls down the stairs with many thuds) Cat Burglar: '''Ow! Ooh! Ow! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ow! Ooh! Ugh! Ooh! Oof! '''Garfield: ''(reading) Number eight: Will then land in coal bin. ''(And he does) Garfield: ''(reading) Number seven: Will probably lean against hot furnace. ''(And he does) Cat Burglar: ''(sniffs out smoke, then realizes it's his burning fingers) (screams)'' (the cat burglar dashes up the basement stairs) Garfield: ''(reading) Number six: Upon leaving basement, will barely avoid slipping on Odie's old doggie toy. ''(which he does) Garfield: ''(reading) Number five: Will not, however, miss pile of my banana peels. ''(The cat burglar steps on a banana peel and slide across the room) Cat Burglar: '''Whooooooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! '''Garfield: ''(reading) Number four: Slipping on banana peel leads to crash-landing in fireplace. ''(The burglar does so by his backside) Cat Burglar: ''(sighs) (sniffs for source of fire)'' Garfield: ''(reading) Number three: Three words: "Fire in fireplace." ''(The cat burglar gets his backside out of the fireplace and bounces across the room burning) Cat Burglar: ''(exclaims in pain) Ooh! Ow! Ooh! Ooh! Ow! Ow! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!'' (Jon returns and sees the commotion) Garfield: 'Number two: Arbuckle will return home from date after being gone 20 minutes and phone police. ''(Jon does so, a police officer comes in shortly, puts the cat burglar in handcuffs, and drags him away) '''Garfield: ''(reading) And the number one reason why a burglar will fail in trying to rob our home: There is nothing worth stealing. ''(Odie is somewhat disappointed) (Bobby, Billy, and Bertie Buddy Bear come in with instruments in hand and play the "Garfield and Friends" theme as Garfield begins to dance along) (Garfield takes Jon's tie out of his suit) 'Garfield: '''Come on, Arbuckle, the band's only rented for another hour. ''(Jon doesn't understand, but obliges anyway) 'Jon: '''I don't know why I put up with this cat. '''Garfield: '''I can tell you ten reasons why: ''(begins to read from another piece of paper) "''Number ten: I'm adorable. Number nine: I'm handsome. Number eight: I have my own series. Number seven: Odie is dumber. Number six..." ''(the last of Garfield's speech is faded out) (episode ends) Category:Transcript Category:Garfield and Friends Category:Garfield and Friends episodes, Season 7